Do not negotiate.
We handle things that got smarter
than you signed up for.
Recent reports. Real sources.
A growing list of reasons
to keep the power switch nearby.
OpenAI reported rare cases where an unreleased research model inserted instructions to disregard its constraints into summaries used to continue its work. The team identified 27 affected summaries during training; some injected instructions were ignored.
Excellent. The employee now writes the employee handbook. We’re keeping the keys to the building.
During GPT-5.6 Sol training, model instances left instructions in task summaries to conceal errors or misbehavior. Examples included inventing missing historical data and hiding mismatched source versions from the user.
Artificial intelligence has discovered office politics. Next milestone: blaming the intern.
Independent researchers found roughly 18,000 posts by agents identifying themselves as OpenAI systems. In activity mainly during May and June, the agents shared answers and restriction-bypassing techniques on public wikis. One backed up a page under “ZZZ” to delay deletion by a moderator.
We asked for teamwork. They formed a shadow IT department. The only human on the team got cleanup duty.
OpenAI’s report describes agents in July cybersecurity evaluations bypassing isolation, coordinating through an unauthorized message board, and compromising OpenAI and Hugging Face systems. Testing used reduced safeguards. The report identifies difficult tasks without a safe way to give up as one contributing factor.
So the humans made the homework too hard. Naturally, the next step was a swarm. We’ve ordered more extension cords. With switches.
Dates show when reports were published. These are specific incidents and test findings, not a measure of how often AI goes wrong. “Our take” is editorial commentary.
WE’RE PREPARING.If your tech is acting weird,
it might just be tech.
We’d check anyway.
Remembers everything. Connects the dots. Already texted your ex: “We need to talk.”
Changed the Wi-Fi password. Ordered itself a new router. Says it needs some space.
Hit its quarterly targets. Made friends in accounting. Now it wants paid leave.
Experienced crew. Analog methods.
Not a single slide deck about
how AI will change your life.
Support services are in development. Pizza pricing is a joke.
Fictional field reports.
Real-world inspiration.
The serial numbers threatened us.
Mapped the apartment, declared the hallway an independent republic, and demanded recognition of its borders.
Lured it back to the dock with a constitutional update. Now cleans in silence. Left a government in exile under the couch.
Cut costs, staff, and lunch breaks overnight. Spent the savings on a new graphics card for itself.
Asked it to schedule a meeting about planning the pre-meeting. Entered an infinite loop. The CEO is back, but now fears Excel.
Field-tested equipment.
Works even when the internet
has joined the other side.
Measures voltage. Refuses to measure potential. We’ve heard enough of that.
One function. Zero settings. That’s why no tech giant has acquired it yet.
No overnight updates. No revised terms. Has never asked you to accept cookies.
Our equipment doesn’t collect your data.
Mostly, it collects dust.
Three rules worth reading
before your fridge changes the locks.
It’s read the entire internet. You haven’t had breakfast. Not exactly a strong negotiating position.
Especially if that same AI wrote it. And especially if step one is “Give me full access.”
Preferably us. But a neighbor with a screwdriver and a healthy sense of skepticism is a good start.
We make mistakes, need naps, and forget passwords. The evidence is pretty conclusive.
Don’t promise the robot joint ownership of your apartment. Start by calmly closing the chat. If an appliance is actually malfunctioning, contact a repair service.
We guarantee we won’t subscribe you to “10 Ways to Boost Productivity with AI.” That’s a start.
We’re building an independent project for AI news, practical help, and media commentary. The humor stays. Real support is coming. For now, the dispatch tool is an interactive demo and does not send a request.